Making new friends

"Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other gold."

Any girls remember that song?

          When I was a little girl, I was part of the Girl Scouts, specifically the Brownies. I only participated for a few short years, if that, but one thing I remember is this song.

          I don't know how it is for boys, but for many girls growing up, this song is extremely appropriate because little girls are always exchanging their "old friends" for new ones. One minute we'd be friends with so and so, until a new girl comes along and we ditch our old friend for the new. As kids we often failed to realize we could have MANY friends, even many BEST friends. However, I do love how kids are excited about making new friends, minus the whole jumping from one new buddy to another. So in Brownies when we'd sing "Make new friends BUT KEEP the old", it was always as if the leaders knew, that us girls needed that song. (ha-ha)

           The funny things is, as we grow older, things begin to turn the opposite way. We no longer go from friend to friend, but stick with those we've grown to feel safe and comfortable with. Instead of the, "but KEEP the old" part of the song being important, us adults need the "Make NEW friends" part. 

          What's sad is that lonely people don't stand a chance. How are they to make new friends, when most people already have friends and aren't open to investing in more? That's the point of my post today. To help shine a light on this issue. Let's remember there are many lonely people now more than ever. Loneliness comes in many forms and is not always dressed in black with a sad face. Many lonely people wear a smile everyday. A lonely person may try to make friends by inviting people places and initiating a connection, but those who have friends usually turn them down, because their cups are already full, and they don't even realize they are being unfriendly, or they may simply not care. 
          As a Christian, I know what "Sunday morning" friends are, and you may too! Those are people that only want to talk to you on "Sunday morning", they aren't looking to connect with you on any other level or day, but Sunday. They may be super sweet people, but unwilling to be more in your life - typical "Sunday morning" friends. Are you a "Sunday morning" friend?  Have you already established your "group"?  You already have people to call, hang out with and DO life WITH and have no intention, motivation or desire to invest in any other meaningful friendships? If that's you, you're missing out on some incredible Godly connections, and people are missing out on YOU. Everyone loses when we're closed off in our "safe group". 
          There is also a new type of friend created by online social networking. The friend that says, "Oh how is so and so? I haven't talked to them in forever, BUT I check up on them through Facebook." Heads up!! Stopping by and visiting someone's Facebook page doesn't feel nearly as good to the other person as it does for us. You see, we have this false sense of connection, without having to invest anything tangible. This mentality is contributing to the empty hole in some people.

          We may think, that lonely people MUST be unfriendly,  but that's often times not the case. Those with friends can be some of the unfriendliest, because they're already connected. Their emotional cup is full and they don't have a need for more friends at the moment which leaves a lonely person feeling more rejected and alone. (We don't learn this hard lesson until we are in a season where we need friends and see how hard they are to make.) 
         Anyway,  as adults I think we should be more receptive to accepting new people into our lives. I'm not saying to get overwhelmed with commitments and break a bunch of promises, but a simple willingness to "see where things go", type of attitude could be really helpful on all sides.  
          Jesus is in the business of multiply what we have, to better serve others. I'm willing to bet if we extent ourselves in genuine friendship to others, He will expand our capacity to hold more friends. He will give what is needed, whether that means multiplying our time, emotional tanks, money, trust, love, whatever it may be that's stopping us from creating friendships outside of our "group", He can multiply.
          Lets not allow the fear of  "not having enough" stop us, from loving those God has placed all around us. I'm sure the little boy in John 6:9 NIV thought he didn't have enough, but his one lunch of five small barely loaves and two fish fed 5,000, with left overs!!! And just like that little boy, your love, your friendship and your time can feed many more than you may know or feel comfortable with

          Just say, "Yes!" and let God make room; creating a healthy cycle of making new friends, and also keeping the old.

God Bless! :) :)