I've spend years in church and what I've learned is that the role you had in High School will probably be the same social group you will be drawn to in life, including church. You may not believe me but ask those you consider friends in church. I bet they were in the same group you were in while in High School or reflect your same experience.
Were you popular? I bet your buddies in church were too. Ask! All the popular people still have the same personality and are still drawn to each other, and acting just as preppy as ever. I'm not saying they are mean, I'm just saying it's the same. The same thing goes with everyone else. This is why there is such a cast system in church. This is why I was drawn to psychology and sociology. I see things differently. I notice things like this. I'm not being judgmental in my blogs. I shed light on these things in hopes that unity will prevail.
Many times we don't know why we don't click with someone or why we are drawn to others. I'm speaking for myself as well. I was not "popular". I've always had a unique group of friends. I hung out with a little bit of everyone, but never really clicked with the "popular" people. I found myself not clicking with certain people at church and didn't know why. But then I realized who they were. They were the "popular" kids. The personality is still the same. When I realized what it was I was able to change and try and stretch myself for the sake of unity. It's not that anything was wrong with them or me. We just didn't click. We could both mature and grow in areas to help unity.
Maybe you are "popular" and don't know why you don't click with someone. Well I'm telling you, it's probably because they fall into a different group which is most easily seen in high school where the cast system is more accepted, easily seen and less taboo. You see, in High School the group you fall into is more obviously because jocks have jackets, band people carry their instruments to and from school, cheerleaders wear their outfits and so forth, gothic kids wear black, rockers have the chains and spikes etc. Who we were was more clearly seen outwardly. As we get older most of us all begin looking the same for the most part, but our hearts, our personalities are still in those groups.
I remember this one lady snubbed me at church. It was odd. I was like "okay? You work with me!" She was nice but as I got to know her I realized she was a "popular girl". She's a grown women and yet still carries that with her. I could say hi to her but she was not going to address me first. She was drawn to the fashion forward, yuppy and those who were just as desperate to keep and maintain popularity. All her friends in church, her group, were all the popular kids in school too. Interesting, right? My tone in this blog is not one of judgment but fascination, so please don't read me wrong.
There are these unseen social groups we fall into that stop us from truly embracing and loving each other the way we could if we recognized them. Who we were in high school is usually the social group we will fall into as an adult. As a church, though, we should work at ripping those walls down so we can all love each other better. That means dropping our prejudices and allowing people to be who they are and loving them anyway. The only one who knows our heart is God and ourselves. Lets take an honest look and ask what part we can play to promote unity.
For me I had/have to stop the knee jerk/eye roll reaction I have to a preppy personality. I'm being honest. Many times we do this to people without realizing it because we've done it so long. The hardest part is being honest with ourselves, after that it's easy. I know you just like me want to love people well. We only need to see what's hindering us and move it out of the way. :-)
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