Hurricane Harvey 2017

The beginning of Hurricane Harvey 2017

(these picture do not capture the worst part of the storm as it was too dark at that time)

           We are beyond thankful water didn't rise pass the sidewalks on our street. Sunday night was the worst for us and waters were rising fast. 

          My neighbor told my husband, while they were working in the yard,  that Sunday night he went out to check the street and he saw a lady standing in the middle of our flooded cul-de-sac praying. She looked at him and said God was going to protect our homes. And then she walked away. My neighbor told my husband immediately the water started to drain.

          I find this amazing since I had a dream, a few days before I even knew of the hurricane, about a hedge of protection. In my dream I saw two sandbags being delivered to my front door. When I think of sandbags I think of flooding. I began to get anxious. What are you saying God? What's going to happen? Then I learned about Harvey. I got even more anxious about the implications. I began trying to analyze what two sandbags represented. "Anything other than flooding, please Lord!"  I shared with a couple friends who believed it meant God's hedge of protection. 

        At the time I didn't know I'd go stay at my parent's house with my three dogs. I wondered if it meant two flooding hurricanes to hit the states? Or maybe two hedges of protection, one for my house and one for my parent's home, which did happened. I'm not always the best at interpretation. All I knew was the dream was direct and vivid (no fillers). Having been a dreamer my entire life I knew these were the most important type of dreams. 

        After hearing about my neighbor's experience with the praying lady, standing in the middle of our flooded street, that he and his wife completely believe was an angel, I know our street and those who live on it experienced a divine intervention.

       I don't always understand the things hubby and I continually experience but I know God is faithful. We are blessed to be a blessing. Whatever path God leads us on He promises to walk beside us, whether we rise above, walk through or have to wait. All three we've experienced and continue to experience. Sometimes, like with Harvey we rise above, but with other things we continue to walk through or stand firmly in faith waiting. 

       All our neighbors were confident we would get water in our homes since regular storms often push water halfway up our driveways. Hubby and I had prepared by putting our important items up high and stacking furniture. I even left with the dogs and went to my parent's home because our area quickly becomes an island and we didn't want to be stuck. I should have trusted my dream and God's promise to me, but my faith is not perfect and I often struggle with anxiety. Thankfully, God's grace does not waver or falter because of me. 

       I know several friends who anointed their homes and vehicles with oil and prayer and came out dry despite flooding all around them. I also saw many people posting pictures of high waters and calling us to stand in faith. As we all prayed together over the internet the water went down and their homes were saved. 

       Why are some homes saved and not others? I struggle with this question. My heart breaks and I can't help but grieve over the loss so many people are facing. I will say this, miracles and divine intervention come in different shapes and sizes. 

       Sometimes it comes as a fisherman in a boat from another state, sometimes it's a church opening their doors as a distribution center, sometimes it's a crew of volunteers helping rip out carpets and walls, sometimes it's random people packing thousands of meals for those stranded, or someone opening their home for evacuees. And sometimes it's an angel or lady of faith standing in the middle of flood waters calling out for God's help. 

        I don't pretend to understand God's ways and His mysteries. I struggle with these things often, all I can do is share my experience and pray it blesses someone and stirs their faith. 

       God is alive and moving. He is faithful. He promises that when we seek him and acknowledge him in all our ways that He will direct our steps. He listens and answers when we call. And He always makes a way where there seems to be no way. Put your trust in Him! He will not disappoint! Even if He has you walk through high waters He will be with you.

"I Have This Hope"

As I walk this great unknown

Questions come and questions go

Was there purpose for the pain?

Did I cry these tears in vain?

I don't want to live in fear

I want to trust that You are near

Trust Your grace can be seen

In both triumph and tragedy

I have this hope

In the depth of my soul

In the flood or the fire

You're with me and You won't let go

But sometimes my faith feels thin

Like the night will never end

Will You catch every tear

Or will You just leave me here?

But I have this hope

In the depth of my soul

In the flood or the fire

You're with me and You won't let go

Yes, I have this hope

In the depth of my soul

In the flood or the fire

You're with me and You won't let go

So, whatever happens I will not be afraid

Cause You are closer than this breath that I take

-Tenth Avenue North

Baptism of the Holy Spirit

      The way the baptism of the Holy Spirit with the evidence of speaking in tongues is administered may intimidate & scare some people. I know because I used to be one of those people.  I'm quiet, I don't like attention or performing in front of others. I'm happy in the background. But the baptism of the Holy Spirit is usually administered in groups and some people have louder displays of manifestation than others. So you may be left wondering if you measure up. Why wasn't my experience as intense? While at the same time dreading and secretly hoping your experience isn't as crazy or as public.
     I can honestly say the Holy Spirit is always extremely gentle with me. It's people, groups and ministers who can be rough. I was blessed to be part of a church in my teens and early 20s that was encouraging and shared many unique testimonies about the Holy Spirit that made me feel safe. For example, they shared a testimony about a famous preacher who only received one word, one single sound when baptized in the Holy Spirit. He spoke that one word over and over until the Holy Spirit gave him more.
        This testimony blessed me tremendously because I had a similar experience. I received  one word while women next to me started speaking sentences and paragraphs in the Holy Spirit. They were loud , shaking excitedly and bold. Whereas I was shy, uncomfortable and intimidated by the entire setting and experience. I felt almost embarrassed and ashamed that I didn't get a full language at first, or so it seemed. But the testimony about this prominent preacher only getting one word was exactly what I needed to hear. And maybe it's what you need to read?
        After that anytime I was driving my car or in my bedroom I'd turn off my worship music and sing my own songs to God and then say the word I had received while also praising God interchangeably. I'd do this over and over until I got two words, then three word, until I had a complete language that flowed.
        Sometimes we don't receive the evidence of speaking in tongues because we stop perusing it after an event. You may only want it while a minister is inviting you to participate but when you leave you forget about it. It's important that you want it. The Holy Spirit is not going to force you or possess you. We must desire it!
         I remember that I never let it go. I was holding on until it was completely mine. I never lost focus or forgot what I wanted. I remember getting a Joyce Meyer's tape on the baptism of the Holy Spirit which I played over and over again, too. I also listened to Lisa Comes minster about the Holy Spirit many times, which always blessed me tremendously. I remember going up for prayer several times after receiving my prayer language because I wanted more. I'm so thankful I pushed through the awkwardness  because being completely filled with the Holy Spirit, with the evidence of speaking in tongues, for the last 14ish yrs has been worth it!
      I've also heard testimonies of people being baptized in the Holy Spirit alone in their bed rooms. God knows your personality and what you need. Find a place you're at peace. Or find a friend you trust who is able and willing to lead and minister to you in this area.
         I share this because I deeply love the body of Christ and I know there are many like me. If that's you, I want you to feel peace, I want you to feel loved, I want you to feel safe and encouraged. Not every spirit-filled tongue-talking, vision-seeing, dream-writing, casting-out demons Christian is a loud extrovert. Some of us have anxiety and wrestle depression and dislike crowds and being center stage. We come in all shapes, sizes, personalities and comfort zones. I know how often only one type of charismatic Christian is highlighted, which leaves the more reserved Christians feeling like something is wrong.
     I read a book that gave statistics on how many Introverted spirit-filled Christians leave charismatic churches and settle for a more traditional church setting because they can't handle the overwhelming amount of extroverts and extroverted directed activities that take place at many Spirit-filled churches. It really makes you wonder. Somehow and someway being extroverted has become the most Godly and celebrated personality trait in some places. It's simply not true. There is an entire group of Spirit Filled Christians many churches are chasing away and neglecting. Sadly, they have found their home elsewhere, usually in churches that don't recognize or benefit from their spiritual gifts they carry. I believe that's a disservice to the entire body of Christ. I would love to see more reserved and introverted people participating and enjoying fellowship in places that flowed in the Spirit.
       My husband and I are fairly reserved for some places and a bit more expressive than other places. I know my hubby will start jumping in worship when the Holy Spirit moves him. I know my hands will shake and feel hot and I'll often cry while praising God and being moved by His presence. Everyone is different. And everyone's peace zone is different. Maybe God will stretch you slowly or maybe He won't. But who you are in this moment is enough. There is no judgment. There is no shame. The Holy Spirit is our comforter and friend. He is for us and not against us.
      Maybe I'll begin sharing more of my insecure awkward moments and how I survived them in hopes it encourages someone. I know those types of testimonies always strengthen me.

The prophet called

the first time the prophet called - read here

                The same prophet that called me before hubby and I bought our first house, called me again last month.  Again, I didn’t answer because it was an unknown number, but it was saved on my voice mail. He named a spirit that was hindering my progress and said that God has something big and something major that’s going to happen for me.  He said the Lord woke him up early to give me this word.

 I realize how some people will think its looney or this or that, but at the age of 32 I’ve decided not to worry what anyone thinks of me anymore. I am who I am! God told me in a dream back in my teens that He had given me the gift of prophecy and that I was a seer, so it is what it is. This gift and calling on my life consumes my whole life, it’s natural for me, and it’s easy for me. Hearing God in the little things, seeing and knowing signs, and having dreams and discernment about things. Feeling God’s yes and God’s no.  It’s who I am in Christ.

Look at John Osteen, He had countless super natural experiences and wrote about them all, not caring what others would think of him. He was even kicked out of a church and ended up starting a new church in an abandon feed store.  If people don’t accept the true you, than maybe it’s not where you belong in the first place.  

I’m not the type of person that displays my spirituality in person. I think I seem pretty normal in person. I do, however, share some of my experiences online where I feel safer. I know I need more courage and confidence. That’s probably the biggest thing missing in my life.

Anyway, the message from this prophet was right on target with my life. I had been praying a little differently lately. I have been praying that anything in the spiritual realm that is blocking or hindering me to be removed in Jesus name. I got this advice from listen to Andrew Wommack many years ago. He spoke on how Daniel fasted for his answered prayers. When the angel, Gabriel, came he said the moment Daniel prayed the answer was sent, but he (Gabriel) was restrained by the prince of Persia. (Daniel 10:12-14 NIV)

Andrew went on to say that we no longer have to wait for these spirits to be removed by angels; we can command them to move in Jesus name – speeding up our answers. We have that authority over our own lives.  Knowing this for many years I still never consistently prayed in this manner. Well, for the past week, I was empowered by the Holy Spirit, and I started to pray this way countless times a day. After a week or so, I got this phone call telling me what the hindering spirit was! Wow, right?! Now I can call it by name and tell it to GO! In Jesus name!

Besides knowing the name of the spirit, it also shows, again, that if God has a word for you he will get it to you no matter what! Acknowledge God in all your ways and seek first the kingdom of God.

I hope these testimonies fill you (the reader) with faith and hope in your own life. God is no respecter of persons and if He will speak and move for me, he can move and speak for you. May your faith be energized and hope renewed.

2001 Flood Dream

         I wish I had documented a hard copy of this testimony when it happened but I didn't. I can only share from my and my families memory. Details like time and day of the week are missing, but the whole of the event is still clear. 

          I was laying on my bed when I had a vision. A vision usually happens when we are awake. I was awake and a vision/picture  of a flood came before me and my home church, Lakewood Church was above the storm. I saw news crews, people dropping off items, others in need picking up items, people in wedding clothes, people sleeping there and Lakewood being a safe place. I stood up after seeing the vision and told my parents. I had no idea what it meant. In my young mind I worried it was the end of the world (haha) and people were going to hide out at my church (haha). My vision didn't give me the context of the event. I just knew what I saw nothing more or less. 

        This is where my memory falls short. I don't know if it was later that day, a day after or a few days after, but at some point my family was watching TV together and my mom calls out for me to, "hurry, hurry, look at the TV. It's what you saw!" I run out and see my vision on the news in real time. I was 17 years old at the time.

       

        One news article reported back in 2001,

       " In the hard-hit northeastern part of the city, more than 3,300 people took refuge on Saturday night in the Lakewood Church, which eventually became the largest refugee center of more than 30 across the city.

     "People just started coming and kept on coming because they had no place else to go," the church's pastor, the Rev. Joel Osteen, said. "Eventually, city workers started dropping people off here in dump trucks because they were the only vehicles that could get through the water."

Short of food by Saturday morning, Mr. Osteen recruited two brothers- in-law with Chevy Suburbans and a family friend for a visit to Sam's Discount Club, where they spent $3,000 on ingredients for sandwiches.

       "Every time we returned with a load of food, the crowd of people would have gotten larger and we'd have to go make another trip," he said.

       But by today, the local news media had reported about food shortages at the church, and area residents bearing food, diapers, clothing and bottled water created a traffic jam in the streets outside the church."

        My family and I watched it play out on TV and later volunteered with the church to help fix up people's houses and clear out all the trash.
        One lady who was interviewed stated as she surveyed the damage, "I was raised in this house. I'm 54 years old. And I've never seen anything like this."

Nursing School Testimony

     I'm starting to share my testimonies because a testimony says, "If God can do it for me, He can do it for you" because He is not a respecter of persons - He doesn't play favorites.

      It's Testimony Tuesday! I'm not committing to post every Tuesday, but when I do post a supernatural testimony I'll tag it under "testimony Tuesday" so they are easily found.

       Today I want to share how my mom was healed of the anxiety and stress that almost caused her to drop out of the nursing program.  After being laid off my mom decided to make a career change and enrolled in nursing. She was doing really well and was nearing graduation when she began having panic attacks and extreme stress. They got so bad she almost dropped out even though she'd invested so much already. 

      She cried out to the Lord in desperation day after day. One day laying on her bed, crying out to God she ends up passing out. While passed out she hears someone call her name two times. She looks up and see a picture of an orange CD with a sun floating in front of her. She immediately wakes up and tells me this has to be an answer to her prayers. I was happy for her but wondering how we'd find an orange CD at the stores with nothing else to go on. I prayed and knew some how God would show us. 

      That night while asleep I had a dream. In the dream I hear the most beautiful worship music. The music consisted of one word, "Jesus". All the lyrics, bridge, chorus etc was one word, "Jesus" it was the most glorious sound I had ever heard. I know in the dream it's a CD my dad had given me years ago but never opened. As soon as I wake up I go to my closet and dig for the CD, not even thinking of my mom's vision the day before. After I find it, I run to the living room to play it, hoping the glorious music is on the CD. As I'm doing this my mom walks out and I hold up the CD and say enthusiastically, "I had this amazing dream about this CD I didn't even know I had" she just stares at the CD I'm holding up and I see the color go from her face and she tells me that's the CD she saw in her vision. I turn and look at the CD and realizing that, yes, it's orange with a sun. Awesome! She said it felt like cold water fell over her head.

        I was disappointed to find out there was no music on the CD. It was a lady quoting scripture for anxiety and stress. But I was extremely thankful my mom found her "medication" for her issue. The CD truly blessed her. Scripture is powerful! She successfully completed her nursing program and has blessed many as a nurse over the years.
      This testimony reminds me that God always provides a way out when we cry out to Him, and if He doesn't it's because we are where we are suppose to be for His purposes. If I could attribute supernatural experiences and answers to prayers to anything I'd say it's sincere desperation. When our back is against a wall and we know all our hope and help comes from the Lord. He is so faithful.

CD cover reads,  "The healing word of God - Audio Scriptures to soothe the soul: Comfort, Peace & Hope when you're dealing with feelings of panic, anxiety and depression."

House Hunting Testimony

           My hubby and I have many testimonies that I want to slowly start sharing to edify and encourage whoever may read.  I know that during my seasons of brokenness I clung to such testimonies. A testimony says, "If God can do it for me, He can do it for you" because He is not a respecter of persons - He doesn't play favorites. I will start with the testimony I shared this weekend with the young couple visiting us (as mentioned in the post before). 

          After my hubby and I had been married a year our apartment rent went up. Fear and anxiety filled my heart as I read the slip of paper listing our options for renewal. What were we going to do? None of the options listed were going to work for us. My husband and I began searching for another apartment, but nothing - every door kept closing. We knew God could speak to us and continued to pray and started planning a time to fast. Fasting as always been a powerful spiritual weapon for us.

        When my hubby first moved out of his family home he faced the same situation and called out to the Lord, who spoke to him in a dream, speaking the name of the apartment three times. Being a dreamer my hubby knew to obey and went to the apartment offices. They were having a special. It was perfect. He happily lived there for several years. God led him to the right place at the right time! So, we knew He could do it again. 

         I forget how the idea of looking for a house came to play but we began talking about it. We called several lenders but the phone would get disconnected or they wouldn't answer until finally the third one we called picked up right away. With all we've been through we know not to question God, we figured we weren't meant to talk to the other lenders. Our lender ended up crediting us a couple thousand for closing costs. Yay! But I'm getting ahead of myself.

        We got pre-approved by our lender and got a realtor. I was so stressed out a patch of my hair started falling out. I have pictures if you want to see the bald patch that was hiding under my long hair. We continued to pray. We had to find a house before our lease was up. 

       After talking with our realtor, she lined up some houses for us to see. As hubby and I walked to our car to meet our realtor to look at houses for the first time, I receive a call from an unknown number. While pulling out I play the voice mail and it's a man. The man tells us he's a prophet and for us not to worry because God is going to provide for us. OMGOSH! Are you kidding me? We are in the car about to go see houses for the first time and we get this call?!?! Through the stress and fear we had a super natural peace. God is with us! We are heading in the right direction! Thank you Daddy for looking after us. 

           Shortly after we started house hunting we found one that seemed to fit our needs, but I was not thrilled about it. Hubby was insistent so I agreed and went with it and we put an offer. We prayed and asked God to open or close doors according to His will. I didn't want the house but knew we needed it. I asked God to give us clarity. I told God my emotions are to rapped up in the situation and I couldn't trust myself to hear Him. Hubby agreed and we prayed that God would reveal the truth to someone who was out of the loop. Someone who had no idea what was going on with us. He did.             

       While waiting to see if our offer was accepted hubby gets a phone call from a friend who didn't know what we were up too. His friend said he had a dream and I didn't like the house we were dealing with. I see hubby's face get sad as he's on the phone listening to the dream and my heart sinks when I hear. I know it's true. I tried to deny my negative feelings about the house because we were in desperate need of a house. We agree to let it go in our hearts since our prayers were answered. Our friend found it fascinating because he never dreams. God used someone who least expected it. A few minutes later we get a call from our realtor and our offer wasn't accepted. Turns out the lady doesn't even want to sell her house anymore.  We continue to pray and encourage one another with the divine phone call we received when we first started the house hunting journey. 

         Shortly after we find another house we want to put an offer on, but first we wait it out and pray it out for another day. My dad calls us the next morning and says he was tossing and turning all night. He couldn't sleep because he was conflicted and didn't have peace about this decision we were about to make. God has spoken to my Dad in dreams before so we respected what he said and heeded the warning. Especially since we were passionately praying for God's direction. Come to find out the house had major foundation issues. Again, God was leading us when our emotions hindered us from hearing.

          The searching continued and the end of our lease continued to get closer. To add to the stress, the apartment sent us a letter saying they were painting our stair railing the day we were moving out from the third floor. Can you imagine trying to move furniture down with wet paint? I was freaking out, BUT God - they changed the date!

       There was one house we looked at early on that hubby said he couldn't get out of his mind, but because of the natural wood floors and other things we passed it up. We decided to look at it again with fresh eyes and a fresh heart. Hubby said that was the house, something in him just knew, but we move forward slowly. We even decided to walk away from it. Hubby said he felt a ripping in his spirit when we walked away and was  grieved all night and prayed continuously. When he finally fell asleep he had a dream. In the dream he walks into an office and sees balloons and party decor with a huge banner that says "Case Closed". When he woke up we knew the house was ours. It was a done deal. 

          The sellers ended up calling us and giving us what we wanted. Come to find out the house was on sale for 20k more the year before and someone was interested but it fell through on the buyers end. The seller wanted to hurry and sell and dropped the price, making it within our budget. As we finished up the deal our lender credited us to help with closing. 

       As for the natural untouched wood floors, hubby's coworker volunteered to refinish them for us as a gift. We ended up getting the keys to our house the day we were to be out of the apartment. We had the uhaul packed and ready. And the new season began. 

Opening Up

      I'm somewhat a closed book. It takes me a long time to open up and share what's in my heart. I didn't realize how closed off I come across until recently. In order to open up, like most people, I have to feel safe - that my stories, experiences and perspective wont be judged, condemned or laughed at. Sadly, it's been really hard for me to find that safe place - a sense of community.

         One area I've been learning to open up with is hubby's and my supernatural experiences. Again, I didn't realize how close off I was with sharing. I guess I learned it's safer to stay quiet. One of the reasons  is the drastic differences in opinions within the church. Another reasons, when you've been around church people long enough you realize it's not safe to be who God created you to be. There is so much push and fight for power and position that if you share true testimonies of God moving in your life the jealous ones will cut you off, sabotage you, and make sure you are isolated. It's sad, but trust me. They look at your like "God did that for you? Who are you? It should be me!" You learn it's best to keep your head low, especially if you don't want attention, like ME. I admit I've had seasons where I cared to much about the opinions of others, but I'm leaving that behind me as I enter my 30s.

        Well last night a younger couple in their early 20s came over to visit with my husband and I. They mentioned how they'd want to get married after college, get a job, buy a house and this or that, but had no idea how it would happen, which led to my hubby and I sharing our testimony about God moving in our behalf. We've been in that place.

          America's glorification of independence rubs off of church people to a fault, but God does not want us independent. He wants people dependent on Him. The challenges in my hubby's life have made him dependent on God and me suffering with an anxiety disorder and hormone issues most of my life have left me dependent on God. Things that seem easy for others are not easy for me, BUT God. Maybe it's this sincere dependance that opens us up for supernatural intervention? The Bible tells us that if we acknowledged God in all our ways that He will direct our steps. When we are dependent on God, we acknowledge Him in all our ways, and He responds by directing our steps. He wants control. It's in our best interest to give it to Him. He only wants good for us. :-)

          As we began sharing with the young couple their faces lit up and mouths drop in shock. The young man said in amazement that he didn't know we were "prophetic" type of Christians. Which in return shocked me a little, because dreams and supernatural experiences is what drew my hubby and I together, we had this unspeakable bond. I didn't realize how private I made this part of my life, and how many people perceive us differently. I guess I'm not intimate (into-me-see) with many people. It's something I really want to work on - being intimate with more people, but only if I find safe places.

         For many years I believed the lie that sharing our testimonies was frowned upon because people think you are showing off,  or whatever it may be. When you start sharing about God's power and His ability to interrupt our reality the demons start throwing mean and hateful words your way. But after seeing how encouraged this young couple was I wanted to try and start sharing more since this is normal life for us.  I can't let a few spiritual bullies stop us from sharing what God does for us. Our (you and me) testimonies encourage the ones with hearts after God. Evil people in the church hate the testimonies of the saints, but the true church, the children of God, rejoice over them.