Road Rage

     A few months ago my husband and I decided to go shopping on a Friday night *bad idea*. Everywhere we turned there was traffic. We ended up being a victim of road rage. I seriously thought this guy was going to pull out a gun or come pounding on our car window, as I've seen many times caught on camera. Out of nowhere this guy begins honking his horn frantically. Hubby and I look behind us to see what was going on. While being distracted the cars in front of us move on because the light turned green. Of course, being distracted we didn't go as fast as person behind us would have liked. So as we did begin to move forward he zooms in front of us, almost hitting our front bumper and slams on his breaks. We slam on our breaks almost hitting him. He jumps out of his car and starts yelling at us and waving his fist in the air like crazy in the middle of the road, stopping all traffic. Hubby and I have no idea what is going on, it all happened so fast. Thankfully hubby is not hot tempered and remained calm. We didn't exchange a single word or roll down our window. We just sat there in shock. The man thankfully jumped in his truck and zoomed off. What just happened? 

      It seems like everyday I'm reading about someone being shot because of road rage. What's going on? Why are people so angry? This one man followed a lady for miles. Then pulled up next to her and shot her. This is so crazy. Again, today I heard the news of another lady being shot because of road rage. Hubby says he's had a man chase him down the highway in his car screaming from the window. Are you kidding me? People are so angry.

     I believe one reason is our growing sense of entitlement. From commercials, to social media and more we are told we deserve this and deserve that. We are able to express our thoughts freely and feel entitled to tell people what we think. We are becoming increasingly self-centered as God is being removed from every facet of many people's lives.

      I also believe we are  stressed out. We work long hours without raises or appreciation while our mortgages and other bills increase, and now mandatory health care that's anything but affordable. We are always trying to play catch up and keep up with our peers. Many of us aren't truly happy. Materialism has exploded to new levels. We've forgotten the true meaning of life. Working our  lives away for things will never fill the God shaped hole in our hearts. We no longer value a gentle and peaceful life.

       What's the solution? God! But we can't force people to focus on their spiritual lives, we can only control ourselves. It's a scary world we live in. We can only pray that God's hedge of protection surrounds us and that we are good stewards of the light He's put in us. We must be committed to shine in the dark places. I really have no solution for other people because I can not control other people. I do know it's increased my prayer life anytime I'm out and about. I'd be lying if I said I didn't have a bit of anxiety but I have to trust God with my life.

      He has offered us wisdom in the Bible. One verse in particular that comes to mind is Proverbs 15:1 NIV, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger". I think that's what truly saved us during our road rage experience. We didn't yell back or anything. Lets remember that before we honk and drive with an attitude that could stir up wrath. Let's try and be peaceful people even in our driving though it doesn't always matter when faced with a road rage - many are innocent victims.

         We must trust God as we walk this earth.

Personality Psychology

        One of my passions is personality psychology. Ever since childhood I would study people. I'd notice things and put together patterns about their behaviors. I'd see their hearts and the secret things causing them sadness, and things that would make them sparkle. I didn't understand it all at an early age but I knew I felt things deeply. I would feel and see what those around me didn't even if I didn't have the words or courage to speak up.

       When I got older I was introduced to personality psychology. "Personality psychology looks at the patterns of thoughts, feelings, and behavior that make a person unique". I began reading books, took a sociology class in High School, then started attending a discipleship class at my church that focused on personality types as a way to helping individuals and communities grow. I was hooked!

       The Bible talks about putting in the hard work to get along as a community of God. Lack of community is the biggest thing hindering the church today. It's not the outside world or anything else we can list, it's the lack of solid community. It's not that we don't want community, which can be the case sometimes, it's that we don't know how to create a thriving community with so many distractions and selfish ambitions. Personality psychology helps with this - it teaches us to celebrate each others differences, roles and functions. God created everyone with  unique functions. We can see this in the spiritual gifts listed in the Bible and how the Bible uses parts of a human body to describe the unique placement of individuals within a community. God created us as moving, living, parts of a whole.   

        Many of us carry a spirit of divorce. We will drop friends over anything. We don't carry a sense of commitment to one another. If we knew how people's cognitive functions played a role in their personalities, hopes, dreams, desires, fears, hang ups etc. we'd be more gracious and less willing to drop people. Cognitive Function is an intellectual process by which one becomes aware of, perceives, or comprehends ideas. It involves all aspects of perception, thinking, reasoning, and remembering (Medical dictionary). I'm not a professional personality psychologist, but I see how the basics of personality can help a group of people thrive. 

         Some of my favorite typology systems are the Enneagram and MBTI.  I enjoy the Enneagram because it includes growth charts that help individuals track their level of health. You can see how your personality expresses itself depending on your level of health. This helps ensure you never fall into self-destructive patterns. I enjoy the MBTI because it breaks down our cognitive functions. Our brain functions truly dictate our personality. God created us each unique. When we understand how our functions work we will be more understanding of others. 

          I know one young lady who applied to numerous jobs. She finally got a call back for an interview. The first interview went well, then she was called back to interview with the second manager. The young lady said she knew the second manager did not like her, and she was right because a day later she received a call saying, "Sorry, we are looking for something different." What happened? Why did one manger like her and the second dislike her instantly? Could it be they found different personality traits more/less appealing? The second manager had a knee jerk reaction to the young lady's personality and saw it as a negative, whereas the first manger saw it positively and called her back. How often do we see someone negatively because we don't understand  their cognitive functions. Personality doesn't make someone right or wrong, just different. God takes pleasure in these differences and so should we. 

          In my past, I remember a woman actually telling me she was trying to make me more "fun". In her mind, her extroverted personality was the right way and my reserved personality was wrong. But, let me tell you, I've tried my whole life to change with no success. Because everyone from teachers, coaches, friends etc have made me feel "wrong" about myself. Sadly, this is the case for many reserved, sensitive, feeler types. America celebrates loud and it encourages extroverted traits, whereas, other countries frown upon such personality traits. Environment plays a big role in whether someone feels accepted or rejected. (Word of encouragement: Always remember the world is bigger than where you are!)

.       It's stressful and draining when we try to change our personality. Once we learn that our personality is rooted in our cognitive functions we see how pointless it is attempting to change it. Everyone's personality style should be celebrated because we all bring something to the table. If the second manager was a bit more introspective she'd see how it was probably her own beliefs about personality that caused her to rejected the young lady. She probably had a set idea of what personality style was right and wrong - as many of us do.

         A community of people thrive when each personality type is equally represented. We can see how Human Resource managers often struggle with this. They tend to higher the same type of people and the success of those they higher only solidify their bias. Unfortunately, human resources managers don't see how those they've rejected often go out and have successful work experiences elsewhere. There is no right or wrong personality type. 

        The study of personality is important for all communities and individuals and I love incorporating it when ministering to people. If you really want to appreciate someone and respect their differences have them take a personality test. Learn about them. See the world from their perspective. You may find they'd make a great life long friend, or a great business partner. You never know until you truly see them for who they are.   :-) 

Guy Winch: The case for emotional hygiene

This is my heart! My passion is for discipleship, emotional and spiritual growth and maturity. I hear it, see it, feel it everywhere.

The Power of God - Healing Testimony

If I have you - Vertical Church Band

 Jesus, only Jesus

I don't neeed the riches of this world

I can't even take them where I'm going

I don't need a thousand empty words

I just need the ones that you have spoken

If I have you and nothing else

I have everything

If I have you and nothing else

I have everything

I don't need to see tomorrow's plans

I just need to trust that you are working

I don't even need to understand

I just need to keep you as the first thing

If I have you and nothing else

I have everything

If I have you and nothing else

I have everything

You are more

 You are more

 You are more than enough

If I have you and nothing else 

I have everything

If i have you and nothing else 

I have everything

John Paul Jackson - Forever changed

He taught us to hear. He taught us to trust. He taught us to see.

      

           It's hard for us to believe John Paul Jackson has passed away. JPJ was the first Bible teacher to speak into my life. His ministry inspired and challenged my husband and I since our early years. He understood us. He had experiences like us. He was humble. He was a spiritual father. Our hearts are broken.

        John Paul Jackson's ministry always  emphasized character as a key element in our spiritual lives. He challenged us to believe God and walk with integrity. He inspired us to live a holy life in every area of our lives. He is also one of the only teachers I know that spoke about spiritual integrity.  As a young teen, I remember throwing away all my magazines with horoscopes in the back, I haven't read another horoscope since. I got rid of movies, t-shirts and anything that brought blatant worship to anything other than our God. This has carried into our adult lives. I truly credit his ministry for many of the super natural events in our lives. He pointed us to holiness as teens and as we perused holiness, miracles continued to manifest in our lives. He never separated the two and we as adults have not separated the two.

         I'm filled with tears just thinking about him and his gentle yet bold spirit. He carried a calm and quiet confidence that is rare. I remember as a teen I heard JPJ share his heart about the rejected and misunderstood. He said he was not after the crowds and fans. He was committed to reaching the ones left out by the mainstream church. His heart was to show the outsiders that God loved them, God was speaking to them and God could heal them. He'd take a team and minster at new age conventions, to witches and people who were in the occult. He wanted them to know God was the true source of power and light, and our God loved them and created them with purpose. He would often say for every good gift of God the enemy has made a cheap copy to mimic it. 

           John Paul Jackson will forever be missed. I honestly can't believe he's not here anymore. I know we will see him again one day, but knowing I'll never read a new article, hear another live teaching, or take a class by him is heart breaking. We will never understand why some live a 100yrs and others pass away so young. Our times are in God's hands and we must trust him. 

          It's hard knowing new generations of Christians will never know John Paul Jackson the way we did. You will forever be missed. You taught us the power in holiness, you taught us to trust God radically, you taught us to hear and you taught us to see. We love you and will see you again.

Is this you?

But he was chosen...

Connections

  "Be agreeable, be sympathetic, be loving, be compassionate, be humble. That goes for all of you, no exceptions. No retaliation. No sharp-tongued sarcasm. Instead, bless—that’s your job, to bless." 

- 1 Peter 3:8 MSG

        The enemy loves ruining God connections because he knows how powerful those connections would be if they were fully realized. The enemy often realizes a God connection before we do. This is one reason we should practice forgiveness. When we allow love to fill our lives the Lord is able to restore what the enemy tried to destroy. The enemy usually gets his hits in first because he's been scheming behind the scenes. The only way the enemy wins is if we choose bitterness, resentment and a judgmental attitude. But if we allow love to rule and reign - if we give second chances - God will fulfill what He intended.

     You see, the enemy knows it takes connections, it takes unity, it takes a healthy thriving church body to walk in fullness. The enemy is always looking for opportunities to to cause division.  He's always lying, scheming and desperately trying to destroy relationships, but he can't win unless we allow our hearts to harden.
      "I have a serious concern to bring up with you, my friends, using the authority of Jesus, our Master. I’ll put it as urgently as I can: You must get along with each other. You must learn to be considerate of one another, cultivating a life in common." - 2  Corinthians 1:10 MSG

    When we allow love to cover the sins of our brothers and sisters -  realizing it's the enemy's goal to cause division, we stop his evil plans. What can the enemy do to a forgiving community? He can't stop restoration when we allow God to heal our hurt.  
      "Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace." - Ephesians 4:1-6 NIV

        I encourage you as I encourage myself, to always see past the obvious, past what the enemy may be trying to do and see what God's plan may have been. Then, forgive! God is a restoring God. It's our own sinful nature and hurt that stop His plans and the enemy knows this. If we settle in our hearts to be quick to forgive, quick to cover, quick to give out second chances, quick to love those who hurt us there is no limit to what God can do.
      "Finally, brothers and sisters, rejoice! Strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you." - 2 Corinthians 13:11 NIV

How can it be

Unplug

         Many people struggle with bad habits, hangups and addictions. In America especially, the idea of demons has been washed over with science and self-help. The thing is, if the root cause is not addressed people will fall powerless over their dysfunctional behaviors. Getting rid of a demon is like unplugging or switching off a fan. Once the fan is unplugged it may spin several more times as it slows down and completely stops. Similarly, in our lives when we remove the demonic force empowering the behavior, your behavior will spin several more times out of habit but without the power it will complete stop. 

        After deliverance the dysfunction will be gone forever, unless a person plugs back in and allows the demon access again. Sometimes people allow demons access to their lives again because they don't know what to replace the dysfunction with after it's gone, "idle hands are the devil’s workshop." 

       Some will roll their eyes at what I'm sharing, but once they've experienced the freedom they will no longer doubt. The devil loves making people think he does not exist. An eye opening book everyone should read is, They Shall Expel Demons by Derek Prince. At the end of the book he even leads people in a prayer of repentance, forgiveness and deliverance over their own lives. 

       Admitting you need deliverance does not mean you are a bad person or evil. I know that is a fear for some. I'd actually argue the opposite. The enemy only attacks those he feels threatened by. God has great plans for your life that the enemy does not want you to fulfill. Plus, we are in a fallen world, some demonic strongholds begin in childhood, or generations earlier and are passed down. Admitting you need help in this area does not mean you are bad in any way.  There is no shame! :-)

       We can wrestle our whole lives trying to be set free without truly attaining it. God has already done His part and set us free. We must use our authority! I encourage the skeptics to try what Derek Prince suggests and see for themselves. It's a huge missing piece to mainstream Christianity.

Sometimes people try....

Prayer releasers

         I've learned that much of what we hear from God is for us to pray about, not deliver. I spent much of my earlier years as a Christian wrestling with this. I'd be out shopping and I'd be hit with a "love wave" for someone. I'd never know what to do or what to say, "umm, excuse me, I feel God's love for you." (haha) and that works - people need to know, but many times it's not the point of the wave. The point is prayer! Maybe add, "Is there anything I can pray with you about?"

        Other times approaching someone is not an option, the nudging from the Holy Spirit was not for them, but for you. It's prayer fuel. I have gotten to a point where most of my alone driving time is  spent in prayer. I have worship music on and I start saying praises to God and then start flowing in the Holy Spirit and prayer. It starts off small. First, you're praying for the homeless man at the red light, then the family in the car next to you and the man with a busted up car etc. etc. You're prayer muscle continues to grow. 

       My husband is used to me bursting into random prayer while driving when I see someone or something that moves me or saying, "Honey, let's pray for this person/situation real quick." and we pause and pray. Other times I prayer under my breathe, or in my heart. Usually if I have to pray in my heart I will take out my phone and type the prayer in my "notes" app. It's a better release than holding in for me.  And there are times I have to get away, to a quiet alone place and pray it out for a longer period of time. 

      I spent much of my earlier years hoarding these impressions and feelings. It was overwhelming for such a sensitive person. Learning that prayer was the point of it all set me free.   The key is obey the Holy Spirit. Again, as you grow in this area the Holy Spirit will lead you to do different things. I always loved driving around my neighborhood and praying over the houses and families- speaking blessings and safety. Your prayer life with God can take on many shapes.

        Some of you reading this may feel the same way. You are overly sensitive. You feel everything. You absorb the sensations around you like a sponge. You are called to pray! Not everyone notices the things that you notice, trust me! You may have even grown up feeling ashamed of your sensitive nature, but I'm hear to tell you, it's a gift! Prayer changes everything. 

      When we pray it releases the pain and pressure of all the things you pick up on in the Spirit. As you continue to use prayer as a release, you being to see that prayer was the point from the beginning and you stop holding those feelings for long periods of time. You sense it, you prayer it out, repeat. You stop wrestling on how to deliver words to someone made of all the jumbled up things you've seen/felt/heard in the Spirit for them. Instead, you become a person of continuous prayer.

El Shaddai

Being moved by the Spirit

     We hear a lot about being firm and steady, about digging our roots down deep so we can stand in any storm, but there are times we need to be moved. Are we sensitive to the Holy Spirit? Are we moved like leaves in the wind? The more we learn to respond to the Holy Spirit the more sensitive we become and the deeper our relationship with God grows.

       It all starts and ends with prayer. If we want to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit we must be people of dedicated prayer. Prayer is not limited to a designated place or time. It's a lifestyle of prayer - our spirit is in constant communion with God. You can pray without speaking, without closing your eyes and bowing your head. You can pray throughout the day without anyone even knowing it. It's about connection. 

      What does being sensitive and moved by the Holy Spirit mean? What does it look like in everyday life? Being moved by the Holy Spirit in every day life means that we are responding to His desires. For me, I can be driving and get a feeling - I respond by praying. I pray for the person I'm thinking about. I pray about the imagine I see in my Spirit. Often times people see things in their imagination and they dismiss it as day dreaming or reminiscing or something natural when in fact it is a picture from the Holy Spirit. These pictures, feelings and sensations are nudges from the Holy Spirit, they are beckoning us to pray, speak, declare in behalf of someone or something. 

       God's best plans are often one prayer away from manifestation. You may be the only one to ever pray for that individual or situation. When you learn to be faithful with the small nudges your sensitivity increases and you find that you are moving more and more frequently under the influence of the Holy Spirit - one act of obedience at a time.

        Other than feelings and images in our holy imagination, you may wake up from a troubling or encouraging dream. These things should be prayed about also. The Holy Spirit is always trying to communicate with us. As you grow, the Holy Spirit will develop spiritual habits in your life. For example, some people have a huge world map in their house. They pray over the map and the Holy Spirit leads them to pray about difference situation around the world. Others may get words of encouragement for co-workers and classmates and share it in a card or letter. Some, like me, write blogs, books, write songs etc. The possibilities are endless.  The key is developing the ability to listen. 

         When I was younger I used to get heavy mood swings that would cause sadness or fear. I never understood. I'd try to figure it.  Finally the Holy Spirit said, "Pray!" As I grew I realized these were not feelings part of me, they were prayer fuel. I was being beckoned to pray for a situation or person. As we mature we realize not all our feelings are our own. We are called to carry people's burdens and in order to pray more effectively sometimes we are allowed to feel what another feels.

        As you become more comfortable with this you may even cry for others while praying. You may speak words that are hidden deep in their heart and hit the bull's eye in prayer. The depths we can go with God are endless. We help bring restoration to people when we allow ourselves to be moved by the Holy Spirit. The more we say, "Yes" and bend to the Holy Spirit the more sensitive we become.

Call on the Name - Vertical Church

You're going East

      Your life is going East. Your future is East. God uses the picture of the sun rising in the East throughout my dreams as a symbol of Him moving us forward. Our lives are always moving forward with God. I realize this is a generalization and the sun rise isn't exactly east year-round, but it's the symbol, not science that brings the encouragement. My husband and I always look at each other and say, "We're going East!" anytime one of us gets stuck in a rut of some sort. It's a quick reminder that our future is forward and not in the rear view mirror.

       As long as we remain connected to the vine (Jesus) our life will steadily move forward. It can be painful to leave old things behind, but we have hope that tomorrow holds more love and life than the things of yesterday. We must walk in faith, knowing that God has our lives all planned out - we must only choose who we will serve (Joshua 24:15). When we choose Jesus, we choose the best path for our life. We choose what we were created for! 

       It doesn't matter how hard the future looks. When we choose God, He goes above and beyond to meet us where we are. Whatever obstacles we face whether physical, mental, emotional or spiritual - He sees us - He knows us- and He meets us! You are going East!

Spiritual Serial Killers

 "In this way we are like the various parts of a human body. Each part gets its meaning from the body as a whole, not the other way around. The body we’re talking about is Christ’s body of chosen people. Each of us finds our meaning and function as a part of his body. But as a chopped-off finger or cut-off toe we wouldn’t amount to much, would we? So since we find ourselves fashioned into all these excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts in Christ’s body, let’s just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we aren’t."- Romans 12:4-6 THE MESSAGE 

    I had a dream the other day about "Spiritual Serial Killers". We can see in the Bible that it's God's desire for us to be connected as a people, to live in unity, as a functioning body. In my dream the serial killer was cutting up bodies and hanging parts on trees to rot. Gross! But that's what spiritual serial killers do. They, "cut you off form the body, and hang you out to dry."

      We often miss the warnings God tries to give us. These warnings are meant to help bring unity and health; it's not a form of condemnation. I believe if more people saw these warnings as a form of loving wisdom instead of condemnation, they'd be more willing to listen.

    There is power when we're connected. Spiritual serial killers understand the importance of being connected more than many people understand it. It just depends if they are killing on purpose or as self-preservation. The one killing for self-preservation may feel threatened by someone's superiority, gifting, skills, looks etc. They don't see their destructive actions clearly. They justify it as protecting their  turf.

     However, in my dream the spiritual serial killers knew what they were doing. Their goal was to cut off any person who had a true gift to bless others, because as the Bible says, "But as a chopped-off finger or cut-off toe we wouldn’t amount to much, would we?" If spiritual serial killers can get us alone, they can limit our gifts, they instinctively know in order to expand we need connection. When a body part is cut off from the body, it will bleed to death and rot. Our gift and contribution to society is handicapped without connection. Once we are cut off, the spiritual serial killer simply has to wait it out - it's only a matter of time.

     I've learned to never put anything past anyone. I've seen and experienced some crazy things, nothing surprises me anymore. We need to stop protecting the people that insist on carrying out division. Our agendas and favoritism will always cloud our ability to spot a spiritual serial killer.

      The spiritual serial killer's goal is to get people to leave the community their in, break fellowship, and hang out alone, cut off until they've bled to death. If you notice one person at the center of countless people disconnecting it may be wise to investigate the situation further. Send out an email or letter. Ask people why they've left or pushed away. Give them freedom to be blatantly honest without fear of hurting your feelings. That's the only way to reconnected with someone who has been cut off. 

     God's gifted people in many ways. Each of us is important. We are all on the same team. It's when we faithfully do our part that the world changes.

It's Time to Dream

         I've been following Jason Heilman's music for years. I was introduced to his creative ministry by a friend who sent me a youtube video. I was hooked. Recently, he's released a new song, "It's Time To Dream" -  fitting for the beginning of this new year.

          We all have dreams God's put in us that we've lost hope in along the way. Life has a crazy way of filling us with doubt, enslaving our schedules and stealing the very things God is trying to birth in our lives. This song will minister hope and encouragement back to you. It will empower you to believe what God has spoken to you and revisit some of the dreams you may have laid down. God is going to finish the work he's started in you!

 "There are good works he's prepared in advance for you to do."

2001 Flood Dream

         I wish I had documented a hard copy of this testimony when it happened but I didn't. I can only share from my and my families memory. Details like time and day of the week are missing, but the whole of the event is still clear. 

          I was laying on my bed when I had a vision. A vision usually happens when we are awake. I was awake and a vision/picture  of a flood came before me and my home church, Lakewood Church was above the storm. I saw news crews, people dropping off items, others in need picking up items, people in wedding clothes, people sleeping there and Lakewood being a safe place. I stood up after seeing the vision and told my parents. I had no idea what it meant. In my young mind I worried it was the end of the world (haha) and people were going to hide out at my church (haha). My vision didn't give me the context of the event. I just knew what I saw nothing more or less. 

        This is where my memory falls short. I don't know if it was later that day, a day after or a few days after, but at some point my family was watching TV together and my mom calls out for me to, "hurry, hurry, look at the TV. It's what you saw!" I run out and see my vision on the news in real time. I was 17 years old at the time.

       

        One news article reported back in 2001,

       " In the hard-hit northeastern part of the city, more than 3,300 people took refuge on Saturday night in the Lakewood Church, which eventually became the largest refugee center of more than 30 across the city.

     "People just started coming and kept on coming because they had no place else to go," the church's pastor, the Rev. Joel Osteen, said. "Eventually, city workers started dropping people off here in dump trucks because they were the only vehicles that could get through the water."

Short of food by Saturday morning, Mr. Osteen recruited two brothers- in-law with Chevy Suburbans and a family friend for a visit to Sam's Discount Club, where they spent $3,000 on ingredients for sandwiches.

       "Every time we returned with a load of food, the crowd of people would have gotten larger and we'd have to go make another trip," he said.

       But by today, the local news media had reported about food shortages at the church, and area residents bearing food, diapers, clothing and bottled water created a traffic jam in the streets outside the church."

        My family and I watched it play out on TV and later volunteered with the church to help fix up people's houses and clear out all the trash.
        One lady who was interviewed stated as she surveyed the damage, "I was raised in this house. I'm 54 years old. And I've never seen anything like this."