Cheap Candy

"A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much." - Proverbs 20:19 NIV

      Gossiping. What's so wrong with it anyway? We know gossiping is frowned upon, but why? I'm going to share a few reason as to why gossiping is hurtful for the gossiper and for the those being gossiped about.

     "Fools are undone by their big mouths; their souls are crushed by their words. Listening to gossip is like eating cheap candy; do you really want junk like that in your belly?" - Proverbs 18:7-8 THE MESSAGE

    Gossiping stops us from healing. We continually rehearse painful events, ripping off our scabs, causing us to begin bleeding again. Bottom line, a gossip never heals. They get stuck looking backwards instead of moving forward with their life.

    Gossiping causes division and separates close friends. The word "separate" does not provide the visual we need for what really happens. A gossip severs close friends. It's not a clean break. It's a painful cutting and ripping, and our words caused it.
    Gossiping is self-righteous. When we gossip we are often judging others. In order to judge another, we would have to be claiming perfection. Of course, only God is perfect. We make mistakes all the time.
    Gossiping destroys our credibility. When I'm around a gossip the first thing that pops into my head is, "I'm never opening up to them!" and I'm being completely honest. Is that how we want people to think of us?
     Gossiping is slanderous. We tell our side of the story without giving the other person a chance to speak for themselves. "In a lawsuit the first to speak seems right, until someone comes forward and cross-examines"  - Proverbs 18:17 NIV  "The first one to plead his cause seems right, Until his neighbor comes and examines him." - NKJ

   Summing it up, gossiping creates loss. It could be a loss of a friend, a job, an opportunity, respect, healing etc. We not only create that loss for ourselves but for others. When we engage in gossiping we are participating in tearing something down when we were created to build up.

      It comes down to integrity. Ask yourself, "What am I hoping to gain by gossiping?" we rarely participate in behavior that does not have a pay off. Be honest and search yourself. What's the pay off? God can help us find ways to meet those needs in healthier ways.

"Watch your words and hold your tongue; you’ll save yourself a lot of grief."

- Proverbs 21:23 THE MESSAGE