One of my passions is personality psychology. Ever since childhood I would study people. I'd notice things and put together patterns about their behaviors. I'd see their hearts and the secret things causing them sadness, and things that would make them sparkle. I didn't understand it all at an early age but I knew I felt things deeply. I would feel and see what those around me didn't even if I didn't have the words or courage to speak up.
When I got older I was introduced to personality psychology. "Personality psychology looks at the patterns of thoughts, feelings, and behavior that make a person unique". I began reading books, took a sociology class in High School, then started attending a discipleship class at my church that focused on personality types as a way to helping individuals and communities grow. I was hooked!
The Bible talks about putting in the hard work to get along as a community of God. Lack of community is the biggest thing hindering the church today. It's not the outside world or anything else we can list, it's the lack of solid community. It's not that we don't want community, which can be the case sometimes, it's that we don't know how to create a thriving community with so many distractions and selfish ambitions. Personality psychology helps with this - it teaches us to celebrate each others differences, roles and functions. God created everyone with unique functions. We can see this in the spiritual gifts listed in the Bible and how the Bible uses parts of a human body to describe the unique placement of individuals within a community. God created us as moving, living, parts of a whole.
Many of us carry a spirit of divorce. We will drop friends over anything. We don't carry a sense of commitment to one another. If we knew how people's cognitive functions played a role in their personalities, hopes, dreams, desires, fears, hang ups etc. we'd be more gracious and less willing to drop people. Cognitive Function is an intellectual process by which one becomes aware of, perceives, or comprehends ideas. It involves all aspects of perception, thinking, reasoning, and remembering (Medical dictionary). I'm not a professional personality psychologist, but I see how the basics of personality can help a group of people thrive.
Some of my favorite typology systems are the Enneagram and MBTI. I enjoy the Enneagram because it includes growth charts that help individuals track their level of health. You can see how your personality expresses itself depending on your level of health. This helps ensure you never fall into self-destructive patterns. I enjoy the MBTI because it breaks down our cognitive functions. Our brain functions truly dictate our personality. God created us each unique. When we understand how our functions work we will be more understanding of others.
I know one young lady who applied to numerous jobs. She finally got a call back for an interview. The first interview went well, then she was called back to interview with the second manager. The young lady said she knew the second manager did not like her, and she was right because a day later she received a call saying, "Sorry, we are looking for something different." What happened? Why did one manger like her and the second dislike her instantly? Could it be they found different personality traits more/less appealing? The second manager had a knee jerk reaction to the young lady's personality and saw it as a negative, whereas the first manger saw it positively and called her back. How often do we see someone negatively because we don't understand their cognitive functions. Personality doesn't make someone right or wrong, just different. God takes pleasure in these differences and so should we.
In my past, I remember a woman actually telling me she was trying to make me more "fun". In her mind, her extroverted personality was the right way and my reserved personality was wrong. But, let me tell you, I've tried my whole life to change with no success. Because everyone from teachers, coaches, friends etc have made me feel "wrong" about myself. Sadly, this is the case for many reserved, sensitive, feeler types. America celebrates loud and it encourages extroverted traits, whereas, other countries frown upon such personality traits. Environment plays a big role in whether someone feels accepted or rejected. (Word of encouragement: Always remember the world is bigger than where you are!)
. It's stressful and draining when we try to change our personality. Once we learn that our personality is rooted in our cognitive functions we see how pointless it is attempting to change it. Everyone's personality style should be celebrated because we all bring something to the table. If the second manager was a bit more introspective she'd see how it was probably her own beliefs about personality that caused her to rejected the young lady. She probably had a set idea of what personality style was right and wrong - as many of us do.
A community of people thrive when each personality type is equally represented. We can see how Human Resource managers often struggle with this. They tend to higher the same type of people and the success of those they higher only solidify their bias. Unfortunately, human resources managers don't see how those they've rejected often go out and have successful work experiences elsewhere. There is no right or wrong personality type.
The study of personality is important for all communities and individuals and I love incorporating it when ministering to people. If you really want to appreciate someone and respect their differences have them take a personality test. Learn about them. See the world from their perspective. You may find they'd make a great life long friend, or a great business partner. You never know until you truly see them for who they are. :-)
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